NiNitan

Feel the air,
U sure cant bare,
Listen to the sound,
Look all around.

There's no time to waste,
Make haste,
I can feel the roaring heartbeat,
There's so much people to meet.

Smile tears and joy,
C'mon my boy,
Lets hang out and roam,
Welcome Home!

Better man

Send someone to love me 送一个人来爱我
I need to rest in arms 我需要他的臂弯憩息
Keep me safe from harm 让我远离伤害
In pouring rain 和倾盆大雨

Give me endless summer 给我无尽的夏日
Lord I fear the cold 上帝 我害怕严寒
Feel I'm getting old 害怕变老
Before my time 未盛放已枯萎

As my soul heals the shame 当灵魂洗脱羞愧
I will grow through this pain 我会从伤痛中成长
Lord I'm doing all I can 上帝 我正竭尽所能
To be a better man 去成为更好的人

Go easy on my conscience 我的心风平浪静
'Cause it's not my fault 这并非我的过失
I know I've been taught 我知道我必须学会
To take the blame 去承担责难

Rest assured my angels 而我的守护天使
Will catch my tears 会替我拂去眼泪
Walk me out of here 带我离开
I'm in pain 所有伤痛

As my soul heals the shame 当灵魂洗脱羞愧
I will grow through this pain 我会从伤痛中成长
Lord I'm doing all I can 上帝 我正竭尽所能
To be a better man 做一个更好的人

Once U've found that lover 当你找到了你的爱人
U're homeward bound 有了归属
Love is all around 爱无所不在
Love is all around 爱无所不在
I know some have fallen on stony ground 也许有人曾狠狠摔倒
But Love is all around 但爱无所不在

Send someone to love me 送一个人来爱我
I need to rest in arms 我需要他的臂弯憩息
Keep me safe from harm 让我远离伤害
in pouring rain 和倾盆大雨

Give me endless summer 给我无尽的夏日
Lord I fear the cold 上帝 我害怕严寒
Feel I'm getting old 害怕变老
before my time 未盛放已枯萎

As my soul heals the shame 当灵魂洗脱羞愧
I will grow through this pain 我会从伤痛中成长
Lord I'm doing all I can 上帝 我正竭尽所能
to be a better man 做一个更好的人

Distance

Felt happy when i'm close to you,
But thr was another feeling that was such a bugger,
I'm like a bomb that need to be diffused,
i tried and acted i wasnt bothered.

The truth is,
I'm stabbed so hard through the heart,
Anger & Hate ii'm trying to release,
I was totally off guard.

I tried to hide,
I wore a mask,
So hard to abide,
I try not to ask.

I slow down every pace,
Just so you can stay longer,
I fear of lost in the race,
Just to keep everything in order.

Am i thinking to much?
I hope i am,
The dreadful dreams kept on haunting me,
I opened my eyes when it was just 3am.

I need something to move these thought away,
I need a rest,
I'm looking for a new pathway,
I'm pulling out the dagger from my chest.

Heart beat throbbing in such pace,
I know it is spelling your name,
Every dream i see your face,
You are the one and no one can blame.

Each time i feel full of joy and happiness,
Is when your smiles blooms in such a mystical way,
I hope one day we can say goodbye to loneliness.
The joy when everyone shout Hooray!

I will stay by your side,
I will be your shelter,
One more time to decide,
You are my cradle.

Live or let live

Should i learn to forgive?
For all these years i fought,
Or should i just let live?
Your sins are still in my thoughts.

Till now ur still in my mind,
Because once you were a best fren,
We both were so closely bind,
But it was i who called it an end.

Should i learn to forgive?
For all these years i fought,
Or should i just let live?
Your sins are still in my thoughts.

Seeing you hearing of you makes me ache,
Then i wondered why is this happening,
Forever means nvr should nvr will break,
From beneath i'll start over again and start listening.

Your the one that changed my life,
Your the one i wanted to be like,
Your the one created what i am now,
Your still a fren i think i still can trust,
For now.

But,what should i do?,
But,what can i do?
But,should i make a move?
But,i reli don't have a clue.

I'm stuck with all the buts,
I made too many mistakes,
Its hard to turn back i don't have the guts,
My dignity is at stake.

Now!
I can only say,
Sorry for all i've said,
Sorry for all i've done,

The truth is,
Sometimes being with you feels great,
I hope one day best frens again we'll become.
For thee is truly a fren worth to trust.

Not sure whether you'll see this.. But i hope one day we'll once again shake hands.. you know who you are.. those who noes pls pass this post to him.. no hard feelings.. Goodnyt~ Ussimi girl~ Ussimi Boy~

With You

Body and soul intoxicated,
Your presence sweetens the air,
Your charm tranquilates,
I realize its you that i cant bare.

I'm able to smile able to laugh,
Nvr thought i can be that free,
You were thr and thats quite enough,
There's no reason for me to heave.

Taylor Swift keeps telling me love story,
Lady GaGa mentioned bout Bad Romance,
But when i see you i run out of words to say,
You've become a big part of my memory,
I was no more confused and tranced.

Edited (request by JB)

Each and everytime you smile,
The soothing feeling surrounds me,
Even if sometimes its just a while,
At that moment it makes me feel free.

You allow me to freely show how i feel,
Though your not mine to belong,
I wish i can bring you to high mountain hills,
You'll always have a place beside my throne.

Deeply in love being with only you,
Wanting to be a part of your life,
I dont want it just to be a walkthrough,
I'll treat you as my future bride.

Imagine

A tree standing in the middle of the big green field of Zanarkand.

Wind blowing,
The leaves sway,
Branches spread out,
Feel mother nature's beauty.

I want to be like the tree,
Plant in such freedom,
With all the greens,
There wont be any boresome,
Instead there's gonna be lots of blossoms.

I want to be like the tree,
Can feel mother's nature,
The feel of freedom is not mine to be,
i bet its as sweet as nectar,
I dont want my everyday listening to lectures.

I want to be like the tree,
They seem to always grow with each other,
In reality which is the truth,
I cant find the meaning of "each other"
Like no one even bother.

Wind blowing,
The leaves sway,
Branches spread out,
Feel mother nature's beauty.
That's the way of the tree,
And one day i hope i can be like the tree.

The question mark haunts me,
Leavin me with no answers,
Rampage! I'm stucked in a stampede,
Stood up fell again i was shattered.

How do i get out of the maze of paddy?
Breaking the rules ignoring the walls?
Do i choose my path slow and steady?
Or i keep running until death calls?

Its like parasitism their sucking my freedom,
I hope for a meteor impact to the Earth's crust,
Just so i'm set free from this dungeon,
Or at least that day will be the last.

Being the eldest in the family... Sometimes...Everytime i think...I wonder i was born...given life to live a life of my own... To live in happiness... Live with no worries... Live in a place i find my own well-being in my own healthy way... Then again i wonder... i was born... given life to be treated as a babysitter... as a watcher for the siblings... To think for the siblings... not for my own but for them... i study work just to make sure i can take care of them... but mainly not for me... I asked my myself then... If i don't live for myself but for them... how much benefit will i gain as over and over again i am doing the same thing for only one purpose is to make sure i am available at any time for them... In the end i asked myself and i ask to God... why am i given birth if i'm not born to have my own life for my own purposes for my own reason in my own way?

Each and everytime you smile,
The soothing feeling surrounds me,
Even if sometimes its just a while,
At that moment it makes me feel free.

You allow me to freely show how i feel,
Though your not mine to belong,
I wish i can bring you to high mountain hills,
You'll always have a place beside my throne.

Deeply in love being with only you,
Wanting to be a part of your life,
I dont want it just to be a walkthrough,
I'll treat you as my future bride.

Feelings barged into my weak heart,
Aphrodite enchanting heavenly above,
I wish i can be your Ares,
I will bravely retrieve my only true love.

Eternity your beauty it will be,
I see no limit your kindness can reach,
Your willingness indulges me,
Every obstacle you just easily breach.
You are as clean as a lily.

Beyond that strong wall there's always rain,
I understand how you feel I can feel the pain,
I am here to fight beside you,
Together we'll go against vain,
We will survive that trecherous storm,
No longer you'll be alone.

Endowed you are from God to me,
Never i thought will meet such beauty,
Your practically prefect in every form,
There no need too much for you to transform.

We're both growing up with the same speed,
Why don't give me a chance to ride along beside thee,
Let me hold your hand and let's start from beginning,
Forget the pass as those are over,
Just give it an ending.

Something in here is as sweet as a bumblebee,
Say no more,
Think no more,
It is you i placed inside this poem ,
Gimme a chance to care for thee,
Gimme a chance to be with you.
Will you today accept me?

We're both are almost the same,
The love we had never looked never felt true,
Why don't we start from scratch,
May be we make a perfect match.

Just like the present in your hand,
Hope you like the color,
PInk and you will always be a match,
Wish you will reach your dream,
As the thoughts you have,
Is what you'll be.

From the bottom of my heart,
Gimme a chance to care for thee,
Gimme a chance to be with you.
Will you today accept me?

泪流到了尽头，
话已说不出口，
我还能做什么，
心也都麻痹了。

I‘ve became a desert,
Zipped tight locked my mouth,
What am i suppose to do?
I've already have a paralyzed heart.

要求者，BoyBoy,
献给，XxX.

Requested from BoyBoy,
Dedicated to XxX.

Please Look carefully...LOok at me! I'm fucking 19 and almost 20... I know when should i go back and i know how to keep myself safe...I'm a fucking teenager so bug off and let me have a proper wild teenage life..If you keep bragging about ppl getting Murdered..I'll tell you one day i'll be one of them...I don walk alone...I wont be alone...I dont cross small alleys...Dumbass...You tell more of those fucking murder cases in the news...it'll happen one day... i wan to be one of them rather than listening to your fucking bullshits....Plus its HOLIDAY....dont you know the meaning of HOLIDAY? Cut the crap and LET ME LOOSE... I'm not a little boy.... If you so scared then i'm backstabbed or wad...y dont u just lock me in a cage..Like theirs any diff coz im oredi in one

Hello guys, don't really have any inspiration these days. Can't think or write out anything that postable to blog about. Well, JB and Mar left for vacation. Wanted to hang out with them though coz finally i finished everything that i planned for myself for the last few weeks. Haven sing in front of Marlene, haven sat down chit chatting with JB for a long time. Owh ya, suddenly thought of making cards again, but marlene is not around. Hmmmmm.... kinda sucks having nth to do, nth to involve in. Our ball team United B is out of the finals and its quite disappointing. Well, its 0303 hours now and tonight 1915 hours gonna have a ball match against Batu niah team. Gonna be a rough match, RUN RUN RUN! hahah...tht's what i do inside. So.. sweet dream Lu... Goodnyt my dear frenz. ^^

Once again i feel pity of myself living in this kind of family. Why dont "he" just send me overseas? Why i have to suffer in this kind of surrounding? Sometimes i feel lonely? Sometimes i feel surrounded by lots of friends, well that's good. Sometimes when "he" opens your god damn mouth i don feel like i belong to this home? Why i feel that i'm an orphan that's been adopted just to be yelled at. Cant he change that effing tone? Cant he just talk to me softer without those commanding type request of favors? Polish the car! Count the money! Check the toilet! Lock the gate! Don't eat too much meat! Pick your sis! Pick your bro! Cant you do anything right!? I am tired I am annoyed he's gonna blow up my mind, he's gonna make me lose my temper. But, i cant cause i know my role i know what i should do what i shouldn't. I know i need him, for now. I'll live my life, my way. But then, again i'm thinking does he even noe my age? I'm f*cking 19 and almost 20 and he's still limiting me like a 16-year-old kid. Isn't it too late to boss me around controlling my actions now? And hack he don't even know i'm on holiday, UNIVERSITY type holiday i have to say. Pls la look at my brother and my sister. Why don't he go and shout at them just like he shouted at me for the past 10+ years when i was in pri and sec school. Everytime i talk bout this the image of my 1st slap in the face come out. I think thats the turning point of my life. Turning everything that i see in front of me upside down. I need a girl, I need more friends, I need love, I need blessing, I need stupport and the only thing i need is ignoring ignorance of this family. I need to concentrate on being someone else to be with the outside world. The me staying inside this very home is totally not capable not suitable and really do not cope with the outside world.

Its 1526 hours,
Welcome to Dick's blogging,
Thx for reading.
Updates will be up shortly.

想你的滋味,
微甜的滋味,
让我能去面对,
欠你的安慰,
尽管你从不曾说累,
你寂寞的眼让我发现,
对你总不够体贴.

思念的滋味,
微甜的滋味,
给你力气面对,
温柔的安慰,
让它流入你的心扉,
给我机会去体会,
生命里有你多美.

想听见你说的任何字眼
会温暖这颗心忘了疲倦
再多的考验不过是训练
训练更多的了解

I feel trembled,
I feel scared,
I feel hopeless,
I feel threatened.

Each time of your come back,
Each time i'll take one step back,
Each time i'll fall hard to the ground,
Each time i hear your name.

I need to calm down,
I need to have faith,
I need to focus,
I need to keep on trying.

I must not be bothered,
I must not be afraid,
I must not be influenced,
I must not be trashed by your silly act.

I need to chill, focus Dick! FOCUS!

Well today was a normal day...which i haven had in a reli long time...but someone just broke the ice..feel grateful and shocked when i was invited...Thx...din reli expect that to happen...and reli reli din expect to hear and know "The Secret"... hahah...thx for telling... letting me feel that im gaining more trust from you... had a great nite... and a very cold nite... was freezing in thr... lol.... Gonna start studying... Gd luck for me and Same for you... ^^

幸福是自己争取的，
幸福是自己得接受才会有的，
幸福要自己相信才会真正幸福，
当对方想与你分享，
你愿意牵他手一起走吗？
真心的他就站在你面前，
等着你把他放在心里。

Last of 2009

Well, my journey finally ended here in 2009 ( last year ). It started with these 2 boys. Kuang the Head and Jim the Tail...LOL..2 great kids..

Then came the Coach Yong Kah Wei.. Silly kid, but full of determination..Keep it up Boy..

And then it happened, a great team was formed. From peak Lee en, Top Left, Louis, Shin Yee, Phoebe, Winnie, Btm Left, Kah Wei, Me (Outsider), Kuang and Jim. These guys are the best that i've met. Full of potential, Admirable & Unbelievable Teamwork. Love you guys!

Last but not least, I have, Must to thank these guy. Thank you very very very much for joining me to compete for the last time. I'm reli reli reli grateful and touched by your guys determination and hard work throughout the whole practice. Though the practice was just 2 weeks, we luckily got 3rd place. Once again, From the bottom of my heart, Thank You.

From left, Chim YunG, Rong Cheng, Jai Seng, Kong Khiong, Me, Seng Kin, Kit How, Kiu yi
Middle, Coach Yong Kah Wei ^^

Have a Nice New Year.. Happy 2010 :)

Ps: Retiring from Ld its like Ending my time with XxX... Kinda Sad... anyways... anything is possible... I'll get my shot...